It’s a documented fact that we judge a book by its cover. The two words in the tile of this blog entry do have two distinct and separate meanings. Prejudice is actually a fear based response. Even though fear is the last thing we should focus on, it is a defense mechanize. On the other hand, racism is a disease of the mind.
I want to expound on prejudice first. We are all the product of our environment and experiences. Right or wrong, we all make judgments on many aspects of our environment daily on conscious and subconscious levels. This can keep us safe depending on the situation. It also can move you away from fresh and new opportunities unfortunately.
What do you think when you see a person holding a card board sign on a street corner or a freeway exit? I think we all can be that guy or gal. Most people are just a few paychecks away from financial ruin. All it takes is one life changing event. It doesn’t even have to be a big one. It can be something small that snowballs into an unstoppable freight train depending on what you focus on. It’s true that some beggars make up to $20 an hour tax free and live a decent life. They give real homeless people without hope a bad rap. I have compassion for those who feel the only recourse they have to survive is to beg. They have lost the ability to realize they can make it.
Racism is a much more complex problem. I deplore this train of thought. I always have, even before I was old enough to understand what it meant. We are all people. PEOPLE! PERIOD! How can anyone be so pampas as to think they are better than another for any reason? We all come from different cultures, backgrounds, and histories but that is what makes life interesting. If we were all the same that would be so boring.
As I was growing up I experience many different examples of racism. When I was a teenager my step dad always labeled people that did or said dumb things with the “N” word. It didn’t matter what race they were, they were n...ers. I hated that. Every time he would say that word it cut through me like a knife. I understand why he was this way. He grew up in a very racist and ignorant environment. This was the only example he was shown of how to function in society. I sincerely believe that he was not a true racist but words you use can make you appear to be very ignorant.
Another example of apparent racism in my life presented itself to me over a decade ago. At the time I had recently made a new friend. This guy and I are true kindred spirits. We have since become the best of friends. One night after my divorce we got together to hit a few night spots. We both knew this one woman that I was interested in dating. We were having a drink and talking before we went out and he made a racist comment about her. You need to understand, I really looked up to this guy. He is older than me and I admire his wisdom. When he made the comment I stopped him in his tracks, looked him in the eye and told him I would never tolerate another racist comment from him ever. I also told him that if that was what he was all about that I would not continue to be his friend. I think I changed him that night. He isn’t racist, he was only joking but it wasn’t funny. That was a life changing moment for both of us. He is my best friend today. He is a mentor of mine but he also has tremendous respect for me. He has since never talked about different races in a derogatory manor, at least in front of me.
I do want to touch on one point of political hypocrisy here briefly. Do you know who Robert Byrd is? If he is still alive I think he is pushing 120 years old. He was a zombie US senator for what seemed like 100 years (it was a very long time). I don’t remember what state he was from but I do know some of his history. He is a permanent fixture in the Democratic Party. He was also a KKK member in the 1960’s. The press portrays the Republicans as the party of racism.
I’m not a Democrat or a Republican. I’m a conservative and a libertarian. I had a conversation with my bio dad a few months ago. He is a rabid liberal. Anyone (like me) that doesn’t agree with him is viewed as a threat to his ideology. Unfortunately he doesn’t know me at all. His perception of my mindset is that I’m a racist homophobe that wants to poison the earth. He has no idea what a loving person I really am. I wish he did because I love him. He is the only bio dad I will ever have. Oh well.
Oprah made a statement several years ago that has always stayed with me. She said, “I’m not an African American, I’m an American”. I love and respect her for that comment. So is this country still a racist country? I don’t think so. Does this thinking make me stupid or out of touch? I guess so if this country is still viewed as racist. Sure, there will always be backwards thinking idiots who feel threatened by others who are not like them but that’s life.
We now have a “black” president (or should I say African American president?). Is saying “black” racist? The fact is, at least for me anyway, I don’t care if he is green or purple or blue. Why is everyone so high on the fact that he is black? I don’t get it. Is this his best qualification? Did he get elected because we needed a “black” president to get over our guilt of our sad history of slavery? What’s the big deal? I vote for the person, man or woman, I feel is best qualified to fill the position. Focusing on who someone is instead of what they are is so important to remember. Can we please stop focusing on the color of a person’s skin as a designation of who they are? It seems to me that focusing on ethnicity for any intention, go or bad, is in itself racist. Please tell me what you think.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Sunday, February 8, 2009
THINGS WILL GET A LOT WORSE UNLESS THEY GET A LOT BETTER
We have become very spoiled here in America. Many people around the world have a negative opinion of us. Is it because we are so engaged in the war on terror? Some would say that is the reason. Others would point to the arrogant attitudes some of us have.
Have you ever seen the show The Amazing Race? This American tv show begins with over 10 teams (couples) that come from diverse walks of life. I used to watch it because of all the interesting places around the world the show visits. Two things really bother me about this show. The first thing is the way some of the couples treat each other. I remember one married team where the husband was actually physically abusive to the wife on camera! Their reward was a psycho analysis on the Dr. Phil-lis show.
The other thing I just can’t stand about this show is the way some of these teams behave towards the people that live in the countries the show visits. Some Amazing Race contestants are just arrogant beyond belief. They give the rest of us Americans very poor representation. I certainly would never behave like a spoiled adolescent as some of these stupid players do. I don’t watch the show anymore because of the way some of the contestants represent Americans to the rest of the world. Tragic.
Our modern society has grown accustom to getting almost anything we want instantly. Just like the ability to buy a house that doesn’t fit the budget (but don’t worry, the government will step in and renegotiate your mortgage if you don’t pay). How did we ever adopt the belief that we were entitled to wants and desires? Who or how have we been fooled into thinking that we deserve to have without earning? I don’t know and I’m not saying all Americans are like this because they aren’t. Many people around the world think we are though.
Many cultures around the world survive on a whole lot less and they are much happier. Whatever happened to gratitude? Why are some so obsessed with what others posses, weather it be riches or intellect? Maybe a better question is how come so many people focus on what they don’t have instead of all of the things they have been blessed with? Why do some obsess about what they can get from somebody else for giving as little as they can in return? How have we become so duped into spending billions of our hard earned dollars on get rich quick schemes that only make the inventor of the idea rich?
So many things have contributed to this mindset in the past fifty years, one of those being the invention of the television. I like tv and I watch it. It’s too bad that we are running out of ideas for true entertainment. Don’t get me wrong, there are still some very good shows out there but they are few and far between. These days tv is more about advertising than entertainment. It’s also sad to see how exploited the television industry and media in general have become.
Back in late September of 2008 I became totally disgruntled with the American election process. I just got so tired of hearing how bad things were from every candidate. None of them inspired any hope for the future in me. If I remember correctly, did the majority of voters here in the land of plenty vote for “change we can believe in”? So where is this miraculous change? It looks to me like the old saying, same s..t different day. This week our new president told America on television that if we don’t approve his new spending bill (the biggest package of PORK in human history) that America will never be able to recover and be the great nation that it has been for so long. If anyone thinks our greatest days are behind us then their life will suck until they change their thinking.
I am sick of this kind of talk. Let’s get the whole country focused on how bad things are and how they are just going to get worse. The more we think like this the worse things will get, I guarantee it. If we don’t let the government print more funny money and control more of the free markets that have made America the great independent nation it is, we will all be doomed. Is this the change the people voted for? Is this the change we can believe in? Did we get fooled again? The only way we will be a great nation for future generations is if we stop focusing on all of the things that don’t work. Vote these clowns out of office on both sides of the isle and let’s get some real leadership in place. I’m not delusional. We do have problems but problems demand solutions not whining. Let’s focus on solutions folks, not problems!
Have you ever seen the show The Amazing Race? This American tv show begins with over 10 teams (couples) that come from diverse walks of life. I used to watch it because of all the interesting places around the world the show visits. Two things really bother me about this show. The first thing is the way some of the couples treat each other. I remember one married team where the husband was actually physically abusive to the wife on camera! Their reward was a psycho analysis on the Dr. Phil-lis show.
The other thing I just can’t stand about this show is the way some of these teams behave towards the people that live in the countries the show visits. Some Amazing Race contestants are just arrogant beyond belief. They give the rest of us Americans very poor representation. I certainly would never behave like a spoiled adolescent as some of these stupid players do. I don’t watch the show anymore because of the way some of the contestants represent Americans to the rest of the world. Tragic.
Our modern society has grown accustom to getting almost anything we want instantly. Just like the ability to buy a house that doesn’t fit the budget (but don’t worry, the government will step in and renegotiate your mortgage if you don’t pay). How did we ever adopt the belief that we were entitled to wants and desires? Who or how have we been fooled into thinking that we deserve to have without earning? I don’t know and I’m not saying all Americans are like this because they aren’t. Many people around the world think we are though.
Many cultures around the world survive on a whole lot less and they are much happier. Whatever happened to gratitude? Why are some so obsessed with what others posses, weather it be riches or intellect? Maybe a better question is how come so many people focus on what they don’t have instead of all of the things they have been blessed with? Why do some obsess about what they can get from somebody else for giving as little as they can in return? How have we become so duped into spending billions of our hard earned dollars on get rich quick schemes that only make the inventor of the idea rich?
So many things have contributed to this mindset in the past fifty years, one of those being the invention of the television. I like tv and I watch it. It’s too bad that we are running out of ideas for true entertainment. Don’t get me wrong, there are still some very good shows out there but they are few and far between. These days tv is more about advertising than entertainment. It’s also sad to see how exploited the television industry and media in general have become.
Back in late September of 2008 I became totally disgruntled with the American election process. I just got so tired of hearing how bad things were from every candidate. None of them inspired any hope for the future in me. If I remember correctly, did the majority of voters here in the land of plenty vote for “change we can believe in”? So where is this miraculous change? It looks to me like the old saying, same s..t different day. This week our new president told America on television that if we don’t approve his new spending bill (the biggest package of PORK in human history) that America will never be able to recover and be the great nation that it has been for so long. If anyone thinks our greatest days are behind us then their life will suck until they change their thinking.
I am sick of this kind of talk. Let’s get the whole country focused on how bad things are and how they are just going to get worse. The more we think like this the worse things will get, I guarantee it. If we don’t let the government print more funny money and control more of the free markets that have made America the great independent nation it is, we will all be doomed. Is this the change the people voted for? Is this the change we can believe in? Did we get fooled again? The only way we will be a great nation for future generations is if we stop focusing on all of the things that don’t work. Vote these clowns out of office on both sides of the isle and let’s get some real leadership in place. I’m not delusional. We do have problems but problems demand solutions not whining. Let’s focus on solutions folks, not problems!
Monday, February 2, 2009
KEEP YOUR EGO IN CHECK
What exactly is ego? As defined by Webster’s dictionary it’s just one, self. That’s not much help. How about egocentric? That means self-centered. That makes the definition a bit more clear. Ego materializes in many different ways. Egotism is defined as vanity and vanity is conceit so if you go to the word conceit it’s defined as excessive self esteem.
Understanding the different definitions found for the word ego only goes to one thing. People with big egos think of themselves as pretty darn special. They see themselves as “better” than other people. Is that pathetic or what? I once knew a woman who looked me right in the eyes and told me she was better than I was. I felt really sorry for her.
Have you ever heard of a bruised ego? This is another aspect of ego one should guard against. This can happen when we allow the words or actions of another to hurt us. If you have a low self esteem this can be a bad habit that can run your life and crush your spirit. If you don’t know how to control your emotions, your ego is probably out of balance as well.
A few years ago I read A Course In Miracles. The most important thing I learned from ACIM is to keep your ego in check. This gave me some real clarity. I used to be the type of person that would get the bruised ego. That’s not me anymore. I don’t let the actions or words of others dictate my moods or attitudes. When someone behaves in an unattractive manor I just have to remember what I have learned. This is simply a display of someone else’s ego that has been left unchecked.
The unchecked ego can destroy wonderful relationships and leave you hurt and confused. It has no problem destroying anything or anyone it perceives as a threat. It refuses to be accountable because it is dishonest with itself and with everything it infects. This is the truth it will not accept. It knows no truth because it is smart enough to know that it cannot be trusted.
Ego is evil and destructive. It spreads like a slow, silent spiritual cancer of thought. It’s much like the hopeless alcoholic. Until a person realizes and admits they have a problem they continue to rely on the source of their pain for relief. Talk about a double edged sward.
If you think you might have a problem with ego you probably do. Do you see yourself as more than mere common man? Do you idolize others of higher social status? Do you feel the need to have the best or the latest version of “stuff”? Do you wish you were born under a “lucky star” like your neighbor that appears to have it all? If you answered yes to any of these questions then you may need to give some thought to why.
Do you accept yourself the way you are? You should, that doesn’t mean you’re all done, that you’re the best you can be. No matter who you are, there is always room for improvement. Do you like yourself? If you’re not sure than make a list of things you like about yourself and the things you don’t. Take a good look at your list of don’ts and choose to change them. I know that is simple to say. Change them, just like that, ya right. I’m serious, you do have a choice.
One way to make these changes is to get a self improvement book, CD, or DVD. That may not even be enough though. Buying a program of this nature and reading, listening to it, or watching it isn’t enough. Learning and memorizing the teachings of these programs is not the same as living them. The only way I know to actually live the positive changes you learn is to learn on a conscious and subconscious level. You can learn to retain information on both levels with the aid of the methods taught in the pages of The Learning Course. You can find this step by step method of learning at www.thelearningcourse.com Check it out now.
Understanding the different definitions found for the word ego only goes to one thing. People with big egos think of themselves as pretty darn special. They see themselves as “better” than other people. Is that pathetic or what? I once knew a woman who looked me right in the eyes and told me she was better than I was. I felt really sorry for her.
Have you ever heard of a bruised ego? This is another aspect of ego one should guard against. This can happen when we allow the words or actions of another to hurt us. If you have a low self esteem this can be a bad habit that can run your life and crush your spirit. If you don’t know how to control your emotions, your ego is probably out of balance as well.
A few years ago I read A Course In Miracles. The most important thing I learned from ACIM is to keep your ego in check. This gave me some real clarity. I used to be the type of person that would get the bruised ego. That’s not me anymore. I don’t let the actions or words of others dictate my moods or attitudes. When someone behaves in an unattractive manor I just have to remember what I have learned. This is simply a display of someone else’s ego that has been left unchecked.
The unchecked ego can destroy wonderful relationships and leave you hurt and confused. It has no problem destroying anything or anyone it perceives as a threat. It refuses to be accountable because it is dishonest with itself and with everything it infects. This is the truth it will not accept. It knows no truth because it is smart enough to know that it cannot be trusted.
Ego is evil and destructive. It spreads like a slow, silent spiritual cancer of thought. It’s much like the hopeless alcoholic. Until a person realizes and admits they have a problem they continue to rely on the source of their pain for relief. Talk about a double edged sward.
If you think you might have a problem with ego you probably do. Do you see yourself as more than mere common man? Do you idolize others of higher social status? Do you feel the need to have the best or the latest version of “stuff”? Do you wish you were born under a “lucky star” like your neighbor that appears to have it all? If you answered yes to any of these questions then you may need to give some thought to why.
Do you accept yourself the way you are? You should, that doesn’t mean you’re all done, that you’re the best you can be. No matter who you are, there is always room for improvement. Do you like yourself? If you’re not sure than make a list of things you like about yourself and the things you don’t. Take a good look at your list of don’ts and choose to change them. I know that is simple to say. Change them, just like that, ya right. I’m serious, you do have a choice.
One way to make these changes is to get a self improvement book, CD, or DVD. That may not even be enough though. Buying a program of this nature and reading, listening to it, or watching it isn’t enough. Learning and memorizing the teachings of these programs is not the same as living them. The only way I know to actually live the positive changes you learn is to learn on a conscious and subconscious level. You can learn to retain information on both levels with the aid of the methods taught in the pages of The Learning Course. You can find this step by step method of learning at www.thelearningcourse.com Check it out now.
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